Death Battle Prediction: P Diddy vs Jeffrey Epstein

“The lust for power never dies” -Aesychulus

P Diddy, The King of the Freak.

Jeffrey Epstein, The World's Greatest PDF .

There is no greater drive in this universe than the insatiable lust for power. Since the dawn of civilization, humanity has waged endless schemes, endless wars, and endless conquest in the pursuit of domination. And in the modern two men sought to dominate in more ways than one.  Two masterminds that clawed their way up from crums to the top of the food chain through networking and manipulation. They presented themselves as angels all while the devil worked behind the scenes. But eventually the mask would tear off, and the world would learn to fear their name like a force of nature.

But when these infamous titans clash, who will emerge as the king? Will Diddy sink the financier's island empire? Or will Epstein out-freak the music mugol? It's time to find out in a DEATH BATTLE!

Background

P Diddy

"Can't stop, won't stop" 

Before the world would know him as the King of the Freak Offs, P Diddy went by the name Sean Combs in Harlem New York. Sean's dad was killed when he was three years old, leading him to be solely raised by his mother. Growing up he attended Mount Saint Micheal Academy, a Catholic school, and... let's just say little Sean learned the art of the Freak off at an early age. 

By the 90s Sean emerged in the music industry, under a new name, Puff Daddy. Puff would rise the ranks and become a powerful music producer. He would gain a large network of music artists, the most nortious of which being Biggie Smalls. And with his newfound power he could finally fulfill THE FREAK. He began hosting big parties at his mansion, where GOD knows what would happen. 

In the following years Diddy would build his freakoff empire while maintaining his public image. The more freakoffs he would pertake in the more he would find himself gaining an ability, baby oil manipulation. Then a dream grew, he would flood the world with baby oil and make a global freakoff. But even with this newfound power and goal in mind, the mask would have to be torn off eventually. In the 2020s Diddy would be arrested. And yet despite his defeat he wouldn't break or kill himself (unlike some people). Even if he spends the rest of his life in a jail cell, he'll live it as THE King of the freak. 

Jeffrey Epstein

"Could you please give us your name?"

"Jeffrey Epstein"

In this day and age there is no name more infamous than that of "Jeffrey Epstein". But back in the 50s the man humanity would come to fear was simply an average kid. Except Jeffrey had something inside him, an ability that would spark his rise. Jeffrey Epstein was  JEW. Being a jew gaining economic power was no trouble to him with his money manipulation powers, so he quickly became a financier for billionare clients. He also briefly worked as teacher was was fired due to bad performence, but we all know it was because he couldn't control himself around children. 

With his jew powers Jeffrey Epstein would become allied with the mossad agency. With their influence he became a spy, with the purpose gaining blackmail on powerful people around the world from celebrities to presidents. To do this he would invite them to his island known as Little Saint James, located in the virgin islands (ironic name). In exchange for helping Israel, he was allowed to be the freakiest mfer on the planet. 

And yet, it all wasn't enough for Epstein. At his parties he would host satanic rituals, with the purpose of turning into the devil bimself. Israel intelligence took note of this and orchestrated his arrest, leading the world to become aware of his crimes. He would remain imprisoned... UNTIL ONE DAY. On Augist 10th 2019 he would "kill himself" in his jail cell. With the holes of the official story, nobody truly knows what happened on that fateful day. Epstein's life is shrouded in so much mystery, was he killed? is he still alive? and only one thing is for certain, he will go down as one of the most infamous men to ever walk this earth. 

Intelligence and Skill

P Diddy

While not known for his intelligence, Diddy was still able to climb the ranks of the music industry through manipulation and persuasation. However, Diddy is extremely impulsive and reckless, often making decisions out of anger even when they hurt him. But explained in the black physiology section, Diddy is inherently skilled in firearms and good at fighting. 

Jeffrey Epstein

Whether you love him or hate him, Epstein is extremely intelligent. He was able to coordinate countless clients and manipulate the most powerful people in the world. His ability to get connections and use them to his advantage is unmatched. His jewish nature also makes him highly skilled in the nature of money. Epstein's fighting skills however is lacking as he isn't in direct fights very often. 

Equipment

P Diddy

Guns

Being an African American, Diddy has access to a wide variety of firearms from pistols to rifles. 

Baby Oil

Diddy's infamous baby Oil. He carries it around so he can make full use of his oil manipulation ability.

Jeffrey Epstein

Quarter Zip

Besides making him DRIPPED TF OUT, Epstein's iconic quarter zip also grants him enhanced durability.

ATV

Epstein can use his ATV for mobility when a car won't do the trick.

Abilities

P Diddy

Black Physiology

P Diddy being a ni- grants him several abilities. The abilities of black physiology include enhanced speed and strength, firearm proficiency, and stealth mastery through blending into shadows and dark areas.

Music Manipulation

P Diddy being a music artist has the ability of music manipulation that all music artists. He can create and control music. However good music artists have the ability to control people's minds with their music. Diddy is not to lucky, as his music SUCKS ASS. As a result he gains a different ability, causing people who hear his music to experience unimaginable pain. 

Oil Manipulation

His signature ability, Diddy is a master  of oil manipulation. With the baby oil he carries he can control it like a water bender. This allows him to blast it, make constructs with it, or even apply it to himself to enhance his speed. This is furthered with his domain expansion, Oil Ocean. WIthin Oil Ocean any liquid can be transmitted into oil. In the domain he is powerful enough to turn entire oceans into baby oil. 

In his domain a case of oil surrounds his body, this is called Oil Infinity. When active all attacks bounce off of him.

Bisexuality 

Diddy is straight, but he's also gay bro. 

Jeffrey Epstein

Jewish Physiology

Epstein was born as the race with full control of society, a jew. Being a jew Epstein gains their most powerful ability, money manipulation. This allows him to alter the bank account of anyone he comes into contact with. 

More combat applicable he can also fire shurikens of David. These stars shoot fast and can cleave through virtually anything minus George Droid's armor. If he chooses to Epstein can charge up the shuriken to create a larger one that can slice people in half. 

Redactions 

Using the Epstein Files, Epstein has the redaction ability. When used this allows him to disable abilities of his enemies temporarily. If the enemy is fully redacted, they become unable to use any abilities.

Grape

Epstein has the grape ability. When used this can traumatized and incapitaciates opponents. 

Epstein Island Temple

Epstein's Domain expansion is his iconic island temple. When used his attacks become undodgeable and his jew shurikens gain increased power and shorter charge up time. 

Dancing

Look at him go!

Forms

P Diddy

Diddytron

With a click of a button P Diddy can turn into DiddyTron. As DiddyTron, he can fire lasers, and his already enhanced black stats are multiplies even further. He also gains a scanning ability to find whatever item and opponent he is looking for. DiddyTron is strong enough to contend with George Droid himself in Black Breather 2.

Jeffrey Epstein

Chungus Epstein

What bro looks like after eating too many babies.

Island Man

Epstein funded the construction of an Iron Man like suit called Island Man. Island Man has the ability to fly and shoot airplane styled missles that are especially effective on buildings. Island Man is powerful enough to fight Captain Charlie Kirk in Right Wingers Endgame. 

Demon Form

Through the satanic activities on the island, Epstein has access to a demon form. The form is achieved when a Jewish pentagram is pained in blood and his allies are sacrificed. The form changes his appearance, giving him lightning eyes and surrounding red energy. Epstein gains the ability of hovering in the air and using satanic blasts. Epstein even gains the ability to revive himself after death. However, the form only lasts for a limited time, and after it ends Epstein loses the ability to revive himself. 

Armies

P Diddy

Jay-Z

Jay Z is Diddy's more level headed right hand. He is the strategist and controls the army itself while Diddy prefers to brawl.

Justin Beiber

Justin Beiber is Diddy's pawn whom he manipulated into his empire. Beiber has Diddy's negative music manipulation amplified to eleven, as hearing him sing can explode people's head due to how fucking terrible it is.  

Kanye West

Some might argue Kanye would not be here as his besties are on the other side. However he would be on this side for two reasons. 1, he has supported Diddy after his arrest. And 2, Epstein is a Jew and we all know how Kanye feels about them. 

Kanye has created the best song in existence, HH. When this song is played it converts people into Nazism. 

Notorious BIG

Even though Biggie is dead Diddy has the ability to revive him for this fight. When that happens he becomes one of Diddy's most powerful combatants. He has high  durability and strength, providing raw power for Diddy's team. He also has a gun.

Will Smith

Will Smith has the ability of the SLAP! When used this instantly kills the opponnent. However, this can only be triggered when he is engraged.

Leonardo Dicaprio

If you wife is younger than 27 hide her. This means Epstein will have to hide his. 

Lebron James

Diddy's most powerful combatant is the goat himself Lebron James. He comes equiped with a basketball which he can use to deadly effect. If the fight enters the 4th quarter Lebron becomes supercharged and gains enhanced stats.

Jeffrey Epstein

Donald Trump

Epstein's best friend the president of America himself. Trump isn't powerful on his own until he is fed McDonald's french fries. When this happens he activates Trumpraga, becoming a hulking mass with extra arms and laser eyes.

Ghislaine Maxwell

Epstein's right hand, Maxell will help Epstein command the army and assist him in his satanic transformers.

Bill Clinton

Another president, Bill Clinton has access to a Semen Ray, an arm canon. When fired, it will launch a large white laser. When the laser hits it solidifies it's target. 

Bill Gates

Epstein Island is the only place that doesn't get his micro soft. Bill Gates has made several inventions for Epstein Island, the most important is a mech for Stephen hawking built out of a PC. More information in Hawking's section.

Elon Musk

Elon Musk always wanted to be part of the group, and today he finally will. Elon Musk has access to flamethrowers and teslas. But more importantly, he can fire ROCKETS from his phone that can nuke the battlefield. 

Stephen Hawking

Stephen Hawking normally can't do anything, EXCEPT with the previously mentioned MECH built by Elon Musk and Bill Gates. Piloted by Bill Gates using an Xbox controller, the mech has standard robot abilities such as advanced strength, fight, missiles and lasers. However, the mech can be shut off when pressing the windows power button at the center.

Micheal Jackson

Under normal circumstances Micheal Jackson should NOT be on Epstein's side. He was trying to save the children and was killed when they found out. However since Epstein killed him he has the ability to revive Micheal Jackson and force him to fight, thus explaining his inclusion. Jackson has advanced movement with the moon walk and the strongest music manipulation of all.

Prince Andrew

He does nothing lmao.

Feats

P Diddy

• Hosted large parties at his mansion (Large Building+)
• Is the undisputed King of the Freak 
• Became one of the most successful music producers 
• Killed The Notorious BIG
• Set Kid Cudi's car on fire just because 
• Didn't kill himself in prison 
• Is probably gonna get away with it 

Jeffrey Epstein

• Hosted large parties at his island (Large Island+)
• Is the greatest PDFile to ever live 
• Became one of Isreal's most powerful assets 
• Gooned to Fnaf porn 
• Has cracked Fortnite stats 
• Didn't kill himself in prison 
• Spawned an unholy amount of edits

TNs and Trailer

(All done by me)

SCRIPT

We open to a black headquarters located within Tel Aviv. The skies are a dark orange from the smoke covering the hellfire raining down. We cut to within the fortress inside a theater room where 4 men are playing Fortnite. The men consist of Donald Trump, Bill Clinton, Bill Gates, and Jeffrey Epstein. 

Epstein: Watch me hit this no scope Donnie 

In the corner of the room Elon Musks sits with a gloomy expression. 

Elon:...when can I play? 

Trump: Shup up musk, keep working on your cock rocket or whatever 

The 4 laugh as Musk looks away. 

The laughter cuts off by the sound of obnoxious rap music blasting. Epstein's phone rings, playing EFN. He picks up the phone. 

Maxwell (Over the phone): Something's here, some kind of mansion ship 

Epstein's expression turns stone cold 

Epstein: He's here

Epstein runs outside followed by the other 4 men. They emerge outside of the headquaters and stand below a giant mansion hovering over. Maxwell walks out and stands behind Epstein. On the porch of the mansion Diddy walks out along with Jay Z and Kanye West. 

Diddy: This is the upcoming location for the ULTIMATE DIDDY PARTY 

Epstein: This amateur can't be talking, you have your little mansions, I have envire islands 

Diddy: Oh REALLY? I heard your island parties where slogs, the only thing you served where babies 

Trump: I'll have you know they are really tastie 

Epstein: You really think you can contend with me? Your're only known as the King of freaks because the world thinks I'm dead

Diddy laughs and jumps down along with Kanye and Jay Z. 

Diddy: Nah, I'm not Diddy because I'm the King of Freaks, I'm the King of Freaks because I'm Diddy 

FIGHT!

Diddy then charges at Epstein full speed. Epstein backs away as Donald Clinton and Gates surround Diddy. From Diddy's mansion LeBron James, Justin Beiber, Leonardo Dicaprio, and Will Smith jump down onto the battlefield. From Epstein's headquaters Stephen Hawking, Micheal Jackson, and Prince Andrew emerge. Diddy charges through the three men as both sides face eachother down eachother. 

The war begins. 

The combatants scatter across the battlezone finding opponents to 1v1. Bill Clinton finds himself faced with Leonardo Dicaprio. Clinton turns his hand into the semen ray arm canon and fires it at Dicaprio. Dicaprio runs around to judge but eventually gets hit by the white laser, causing him to solidify. Across the battlefield Prince Andrew encounters will Smith. 

Smith: What do you do??? 

Andrew: Uhhhhhh 

Smith gets annoyed at Andrew's lack of response, but quickly gets enraged. He rushes down Andrew and slaps him square in the face, causing him to disintigrate. As Will watches him fade away two people zip past him. Justin Beiber runs as Micheal Jackson chases after him. 

Beiber: AHHHH

Jackson: You don't understand, it's not safe, we need to GO, HEE-HEE 

Back near the center of the battlefield Diddy chases an Epstein who's running backwards while facing fowards. Epstein fires small David shurikens which Diddy quickly dodges. 

Diddy: YOU CANT OUTRUN ME I'M BLACK! 

From the two bottles of baby oil on his side Diddy uses his oil bending to release them and fire a large beam of baby oil at Epstein. Epstein gets hit and launches into the headquarters, demolishing it. From the rubble Epstein is still standing, brushing off his quarter zip. Diddy tries to get his oil to wrap around Epstein but with a motion the oil gets redacted and stops middair. Furious, Diddy charges forward and begins firing a series of punches at Epstein, but they visibly do no damage. 

Epstein: Check the drip 

Epstein holds out his hand and changes a large star of David. He uppercuts Diddy with it, sending it him the sky. Midair Diddy presses a button on his suit that activates his Diddytron form allowing him to hover in the air. Diddytron's laser eye charges and fires a beam at the ground that Epstein narrowly avoids. He pulls his phone out and makes a call. 

Epstein: Get me my suit, and start the pentagram 

Across the battlefield Maxwell nodds. 

Epstein continues avoding the laser as Diddy flies down to get in close. He charges one red blast that fires directly at Epstein who stands still. Epstein's island Man suit flies in and lands in front of him as the blast was about to it. Epstein climbs into the Island Man suit and flies high into the sky. He fires a series of missiles which rain down at Diddytron. Diddytron counters by firing a laser beam which cuts through the missiles as they close in, before he took flies up. 

Within the chaos of the battlefield Elon Musk and Kanye West are commuting as they battle. 

Kanye: I just don't get it man, why work with a jew? 

Elon (sighing): I just... wanna be accepted y'know 

Kanye: I get it man... check out this song

Kanye pulls out a speaker which begins playing "HH" by Ye. Kanye begins rapping along to Elon's amusement. 

Elon: That's pretty good 

Kanye (rapping along): They don't understand the things I say on Twitter 

At the word Twitter Elon becomes enraged. 

Elon: TWITTER!? It's X NOT Twitter! 

Elon quickly clicks a button on his phone saying "Launch rocket". From high into a sky a large rocket begins to descend towards the battlefield. As Micheal Jackson is moonwalking towards Justin Beiber the latter looks up and stares at the rocket. He begins to scream extremely loudly, causing everyone on the battlefield to cover their ears. The sound reaches the sky and the rocket combusts middair. 

Micheal Jackson tries to regain his rooting but is nearly knocked down by Stephen Hawking driving through the battlefield. From on edge of the demolished Headquaters Bill Gates stands with an Xbox controller dictating Hawking's movements. Hawking continues zipping around until he slams into LeBron James. 

LeBron: Here catch

LeBron tosses his basketball at Hawking which topples him over. 

Gates: Dammit! Stephen it's time to activate mecha hawking! 

Bill Gates presses the Xbox button in the center of the controller. Stephen Hawking's wellchair begins to convert into a robotic mech that towers over over Lebron in size. 

LeBron: It's 4th quater already? 

LeBron begins to glow orange as him and Hawking get straight to boxxing. LeBron jumps up into the sky for a ground pound which Hawking dodges. Hawking counters with a missile that Lebron catches in his hand. LeBron does a spin and redirects the missiles at Hawking, damaging the mech. 

Gates: NO! We can't let him get close! 

Gates shifts the controller up causing Hawking to rocket into the air. Hawking charges a large ball of energy in his hand before tossing it at LeBron. LeBron  grabs his basketball and dribbles enough to reach an angle to that allows him to jump over the energy ball entirely. He thren throws up his hands and makes a shot with the basketball, hitting the windows power button on Hawking's mech. The mech shuts off and plummets towards the ground. 

Bill Gates looks up to see the mech falling. He jumps over to avoid it crashing into him. He groans and presses a button on his glasses. At the end of the battlefield Trump is laying down relaxing until he gets an emergency alert. Trump jumps up and pulls out McDonalds french Fries. He quickly gobbles then as he runs to the battlefield. Trump begins to contort and grow larger and more muscular. An extra pair of arms rip through his suit as his eyes glow red. Trumpraga lets out a roar, leading everyone in the battlefield to direct their attention at him. Will Smith runs up and tries to slap him but gets backhanded away. LeBron tries to throw his basketball but it gets popped by Trumpraga's upper arms. 

Up above Diddy and Epstein remain in their aerial battle. Diddy looks down and sees Trumpraga. He presses a button on his arm creating a screen showing Jay Z. 

Diddy: Get Biggie 

We cut to Jay Z standing on the porch of the floating mansion before he goes inside

Epstein: TRUMP! THE MANSION!

Trumpraga directs his attention at Jay Z entering the mansion and begins to charge towards it. Inside the mansion Jay Z enters a chamber with a tube comprising green liquid. Jay Z presses a lever and the tube cracks open. Biggie Balls rises from the tube and hops out with a pistol drawn. From outside Trumpraga leaps up and lands on top of the mansion. He begins beating down on the roof, decimating the structure. He keeps beating and beating until the mansion collapses to the ground. Trump scrapes through the rubble but is met with an upperccut from Biggie. The force causes Trumpraga to stumble until he regains his footing. 

Biggie and Trumpraga get straight to boxing, going blow for blow, each impact making the ground shake. Biggie jumps back and fires his gun at Trumpraga, the shots connecting and causing him to bleed and roar. He tries to attack but the bleeding causes him to slow down. 

Trump: BIIIILLLLLL!!!!!!!

Clinton: Yes? 

Gates: Yes? 

Clinton looks at the situation and fires his semen ray at Biggie Smalls. Biggie is caught off guard and gets hit by it, causing him to slow down to a near freeze. He tries to push through but is unable to avoid a full power 4 first punch from Trumpraga. The punch turns Biggie to paste, completely splatting his body. Trumpraga falls to the ground succumbing to the gunshots

As Biggie's blood flies up it is stopped midair. Ghislaine Maxwell is holding up her hand, the hand glowing with a satanic energy that is using telekenis. The blood gets moved to the ground and begins spreading, creating a shape along the battlefield. We cut to Epstein flying above while dodging Diddytron's lasers. He looks down to see the shape the blood created, a Jewish pentagram. 

Epstein (smiling): Perfect

The pentagram begins to glow red. It rises from the ground while spinning like a blade. All the combatants bellow get blended to peices by the pentagram all at once, including Maxwell. Their shredded bodies are all that remains. Diddy looks down with a horrified expression before looking up at Epstein. From the bodies red satanic mist floats up. 

Epstein: Tell me Diddy...

The mist wraps around Epstein and envelops him from view. The sky blackens as clouds close in. Epstein begins to laugh as Diddy sees his eyes glow with electricity through the mist. Then the mist disperses, leaving only Epstein with the electricty eyes and red energy around him. He has finished his demonic transformation and is now floating in the air. 

Epstein:....do you think you're the devil himself 

Epstein's eyes glow brighter and he fires eye lasers at Diddy. Diddy is hit by the blast and all his cybernetic enhancements get destroyed. He begins to fall bellow to the ground, descending towards the pentagram blender. He holds out his hands and baby oil summons to him and allows him to maintain his balance in the air. Epstein charges another eye laser as Diddy puts his two hands together. 

Diddy: DOMAIN EXPANSION! OIL OCEAN 

The battlefield gets shifted and the combatants find themself standing above an ocean of baby oil. Diddy begins to wave his arms around, bending the massive amounts of oil. Epstein groans and flies forward to try and punch Diddy. His punch connects but slides right off of Diddy's body from oil infinity. Diddy chuckles and launches a blast of oil at Epstein. Epstein raises his hands to block the attacks but then finds himself wrapped and entangled by oil. Diddy comes from behind him uses his right hand to grab Epstein's head. He lifts up his other hand, causing the entire ocean to float. He makes all the oil fire directly at Epstein. Epstein uses his eye lasers to destroy some of the oil but it's of no use as the oil enters his mouth and floods his insides. 

Diddy: let's see how you like having someone come in your mouth

The entire ocean of oil fills Epstein, causing his entire body to explode from overflowing. Diddy drops the oil leaving it to fall into the ocean as he holds Epstein's deceased head. Epstein's head drops into the oil and begins to float down. Diddy looks up and roars... until from below the ocean begins to glow red.

Epstein's body parts rise into the air and reconstruct, reviving him back. 

Epstein: you're just like the rest of the world, thinking I'll just die too easily. 

Diddy tries to launch more oil until-

Epstein: Domain expansion, Epstein Island temple 

Both domains' backgrounds begin to clash with the temple of epstein island rising from the oil ocean. Epstein stands on top of the temple and launches a barrage of shurrikans of david. Diddy tries to block with a baby oil shield but the shurrikans cut through it. One shurrikan hits Diddy's mouth and causes him to bleed from there.

In one motion, both combatants charge up their final attacks. Epstein lifts his hand into the air and charges up a gigantic shurrkan of david. On the other side diddy constructs a gigantic oil laser in front of him. In the same moment both attacks go off. The oil laser fires and haults the giant shurrikan moving forward. The shurrikan stands still until he cuts through the oil. It goes past the laser and flies at Diddy. After a quick flash Diddy looks down to see the shurikan has split through his mid section. 

Both domains disappear and both combatants reappear in the Tel Aviv battlefield of before, surrounding by the bodies of the dead armies. Diddy falls over, his lower and upper half separating. Epstein stands bellow him as he loses life. 

Epstein: You did well, Sean Combs, I'll never forget you for as long as I live 

Epstein smiles at Diddy's dead body before walking away. 

KO!

Verdict 

Stats

When it comes to raw base stats Diddy holds the advantage due to being black. Being black means he has better speed and strength inherently ignoring any buffs. In addition he can use his oil manipulation to enhance his already supperior speed. However Epstein is blatantly more powerful in his demon form with him being at ISLAND level while Diddy is only at large building. It's also worth noting that even in base Epstein had better durability with his Quater Zip.

In conclusion Diddy takes speed while Epstein takes power. 

Territorial Factors

Overall Epstein is way more intelligent than Diddy and is less impulsive to make mistakes that will cost him the fight. He would also be a better leader of his army and would prioritize stragedy. In addition, Epstein has three supergenius' on his side adding to his intelligence advantage. 

However, Diddy is black and thus has surperior combat skill over Epstein. Epstein isn't known to be a skilled fighter while Diddy has been shown to fight people directly. 

In conclusion Epstein takes intelligence while Diddy takes skill. 

Army

Now onto the big factor their armies. To settle this let's analyze major factors

Musis

Kanye West's music manipulation is very powerful but it is not as powerful as Micheal Jackson's. Meaning ironically Epstein's side has the advantage when it comes to the music war. Furthermore if Kanye where able to control Epstein's side and make them Nazis, they would also attack most of Diddy's army for being black. 

Similar to Kanye, Beiber gets countered by Micheal Jackson. While Beiber could shatter everyone's brains with his singing, Micheal Jackson could use his singing to heal his allies. This point goes to team Epstein.

Weaponry

Elon Musk provides Epstein's side a significant amount of weapons through flamethrowers and other inventions. But Elon's rocket is not an instant win since Epstein does not possess the travel speed to avoid the rocket's radius. In fact since Diddy is faster the rocket would result in a Diddy win as he has the speed to dodge it. Epstein's side also has the combination of Bill Gates and Stephen Hawking with their robot. The two together create serious firepower that can overwhelm Diddy's side.

This isn't to say Diddy's side is out of advantages. Since most of them are black they are LOADED with guns. However this is about quality and not quantity, as the gun's aren't as useful as something like Clinton's semen ray which can be used to dismantle key opponents. This point goes to team Epstein.

Power 

Epstein's strongest member is Trumpraga, which exhibits ludicrise power. However Biggie Smalls while smaller in size is able to match Trumpraga's strength output. In addition while not as powerful as Trumpraga, LeBron in 4th quarter can easily beat anyone else in Epstein's army minus Epstein himself. There's also Will Smith who's slap can one shot opponents. Despite the power advantage Epstein has in general, this point goes to Diddy.

Abilities

The final category, abilities. You would think Epstein's grape hax would be an instant win as it would incapacitate Diddy, BUT NO. because Diddy is half gay, meaning it would have no effect on him. And Oil Manipulation was incredibly powerful and spelled an instant win in certain scenarios. However the rest of Epstein's tool kit meant he could secure the victory. For starters his redaction ability is incredibly useful for gaining momentum even if it's short term. Epstein's demon form not only flipped the power debate but also gave him an extra life, but this isn't a large factor due to it being temporary. It's also worth mentioning that Diddy's music manipulation could be potent, it cannot be a large wincon due to the reasons we explained in the music army section. 

But the biggest debate came down to whether Epstein could bypass oil infinity, and the answer is yes. Through the shurikens of David, Epstein possessed a tool that could cut through Diddy's baby and even oil infinity. It's also worth noting that if Epstein used his domain expansion it would result in an instant death as the stars would be impossible to avoid. Diddy's domain would also be an insant death through oil overflow, but due to Epstein's higher intelligence he would be more strategic on when to use his domain to gain the win. 

While it is incredibly close, abilities goes to Epstein.

Conclusion

Diddy

"Now this is what the music industrie's all about! I LOVE THIS GAME!"

Advantages

• Faster no matter what 
• Stronger in base 
• More skilled and experienced in combat 
• Beiber and Kanye are useful 
• Has more quantity in firepower
• Biggie and Lebron are incredibly powerful
• Completely blocks Epstein's grape hax due to being half gay 
• Oil Manipulation is very powerful and versitile
• Domain is a near instant win

Disadvantages 

• Not as intelligent or strategic 
• Easily angered and impulsive
• WAY less powerful than Epstein's demon form 
• Beiber and Kanye are hard countered by Jackson 
• The baby oil is countered by the star of David shurikens 

Epstein

"Do you think you're the devil himself?"

"No but I have a pretty good mirror"

Advantages

• More intelligent and strategic, especially with his teammates 
• Shurikens hard counter the baby oil 
• Micheal Jackson hard counters any music shenanigans on Diddy's side
• Way stronger in demon form 
• Quarter zip granted better durability 
• Redactions are very useful 
• Had way more advanced and useful weaponry 
• Trumpraga was the strongest army member on either side 
• Domain is an instant win  

Disadvantages 

• always slower
• weaker in base 
• grape ability is completely useless 
• less experienced and skilled in combat
• prince Andrew was fucking useless

And so, The greatest PDF left the King of Freak slain and showed Diddy that there is no island like Epstein's. 

The winner is Jeffrey Epstein

Next time...

"I can't debate"